After nearly a year, i finally stepped into the temple. The last was last year feb during my mum's 1st yr anniversary! I didnt pray from then till now in a temple! But today, i did it, with utmost respect for someone who i have not seen in person but someone who i have lots of respect for! My fren's granddad! Felt gd praying after so long! Hmmmz. Nice feeling.
Anyway i felt really light hearted being ard with all the family members of my buddy! Was really something diff. An experience u will not get anywhere else. I would have been very sad if i wasnt part of it today! But thanks for giving me the chance to attend to it. I went down purely cos of my buddy and her granddad. I decided that i will be part of this the day that i attended the funeral. Jus wanted to be there and not cos of any inner ulterior motive or wat if anybody else were to think anything abt it. If u know me well, u would know what i m saying is true.
Well, i have waited for sometime already. More like i was forced to wait cos of wat happened. Nobody would believe me if i had told them tt i had a small interaction with god before what i was gonna do. And god placed a big obstacle right in front of me. I never saw it coming but when it did, i had no choice but to go with it. And i found out that rather than being selfish abt my own feelings, i cared more for what had happened. I like the genuine feeling that i have brought out within myself. It feels nice to be like that.
Its abt time that i actually let out wat i m suppose to. The time was maybe right before this but somehow it was denied. Now, i know that the right time is nowhere near. But for me to wait is to create an excuse for myself. My main worry is not to be fake. I have been genuine all the way and now if i am gonna hide this away, that would be the most terrible thing that i'll be ever doing. For that, i must reveal what i had to. There is this code that really represents what i am suppose to do! "Fortune favours the brave - you have to attempt it no matter how frightened you are… whether it's for getting work, girls, or anything."
I already know how the outcome will be. I even know that it might not be appreciated and it might cause some level of disappointment. But no matter how frightened i am on what the future beholds for me, i am still gonna go ahead telling it! I have to. There is no way that i should keep this within myself. Its just bad. Its quite a distraction within me. Letting it out will surly ease it. I have that belief! I'm really hoping for a proper outcome though i have my doubts abt it. But well, though it was only failure that i have tasted in my past attempt, i need to do this till i see success. Wish me luck. Well if u never got any sight of what i actually said for this entire post, well i m sorry. Hahaha!
Ganeshan | 7:55 AM