Finally its recess week! I had never got to keep away from my notes and books before this period. Studying everyday and even every weekend for real long hours can be quite sick. But well somehow tt help me to clear most of my tests with ease! Recess week is a gd time to take a bit of rest. Maybe like the whole of yesterday and today. But i cant afford to waste time after tt cos the recess week really matters from wat i realised last sem!!! I've gotta keep my momentum going!!

I am very pleased with most of the issues at home. Been a long time since i have said such a thing. I think it was a great idea of staying together. My niece and nephew never fail to make my day and they help me forget my problems nd all! Everyday i jus spend some time playing with them. I'm quite influenced by the way my nephew is tt sometimes i do whatever he would do in sch hahaha! But its a gd feeling. Becoming a child again.

I am quite proud of my sis and bro-in-law. I always loved hard working ppl. And i can see them really putting in tt effort in life. That is why they re where they belong to now! I am awed by the hours tt they work and also how they skip lunch for the entire day and eat only one meal at nite. Definately i wun be able to do so!!! hahaha! Talking bt eating, i have really cut down on my food intake just to lose weight on purpose! I dun eat my usual heavy supper like last time. I wanna tone myself in such a way tt i wun look fat from any angle!! haha

2 days ago on 24th sept i was very sad. Cos it was my mum's bdae and i couldnt do anything for her. I initiated the house being vegetarian and told my maid to cook vegetarian for everyone. I had great difficulty in sch not eating non veg. But i jus did it. Well the day past quite wel cos i have a few frens who were trying to make me smile knowing wat was going on. Feel so gd to have such ppl ard.

Had a real terrible week studying for 5tests. Gd tt they are all over now!! Anyway gotta mention abt one of my new frens whom i jus came to know. Her name is junaidah! A real nice fren i have to say and i feel so blessed getting to know someone like her. So innocent and nice tt u know tt she'll be there no matter wat as a fren! U dun see that many genuine ppl ard nowadays. Especially when it comes to girls. But she is jus really nice and she doesnt expect anything out of me when helping me out. Never fail to bring the smile in me cos she practically laughs for the entire day. Never seen her not smiling. So feel gd tt i have met such a fren! She brought for me hari raya kuih and all. Was really nice. Liked it a lot! Its gd to have nice ppl ard!

Last week sat i had the chance to go out with a few nice ppl!!! Was a very last min thingy. It was a drinking session somemore! Somehow chose to go but i really tot it was a nice outing. Gotta ease of from stress before the test week! The frens there were also very funny and active. I felt gd being ard with them. Hope they share the same sentiments haha.

I dunno wats happening to me nowadays. I have a very weird kind of thought. Hmmm. Dunno why but yea. Guess i miss someone quite badly!! Dunno why suddenly but i do. Cannot stop thinking. Hope everything has a reason behind it and tt it will end up gd. Jus hoping for something gd. Actually i hate hoping cos it never happens when i hope. Hmmm! Let's wait and see!
Ganeshan | 7:49 PM

Deep within a feeling of sorrow that i cannot tell the world and explain. Its so painful, but i think i have asked for it! Guess its time i need to know what's reality and what's not and stop living in a world of dreams. Me aint the ace among the deck of cards nor am i the most beautiful among the bouquet of roses! What we re is what we deserve. Guess life doesnt want me to taste the most vibrant and everlasting experience. Rather a dull and dark one best suits me!-NESH
Ganeshan | 3:27 AM

Today has been a very tiring day! Had only one hr break from like 1030am till 6.30pm! And i didnt rest much when i came home cos tmr have this short quiz for my mp2004 module. So yup, decided to call it a day after revising enough for it! Gonna just relax now by listening to some nice music!

Anyway, past few days a few incidents happened tt shook me a bit! It is regarding me and one of my closest friends as of present in sch! It has been sometime tt i got to sit down and chat with this friend. And i was jus missing the company all the while. But few days ago, i think on monday, i was saddened by a rather lame and dumb statement made by my friend as a form of joke. Dunno why i was affected by it, though i knew it was a joke. Somehow i got reminded of some event in the past by it and seriously didnt want my friend to end up in tt stage. Was just a bit paranoid. This happens when u value someone so much! Haiz. Was jus affected but nvm, everything was fine by the next day cos my friend apologized for making tt statement, though it was not necessary. Haha i think it was my fault to just take a normal joke to such an extent. Just cause it was something tt really caused me to feel uneasy, a joke tt i couldnt really see any humour in it, my friend did take the effort to apologize. Appreciated the kind thought and consideration of my friend. Really great!!

So after this incident, i told my friend to come sit with me for my forensic lect, just to enjoy the company after a long long time. But tt wasnt the initial reason. My other frens whom i usually sit with were suppose to go for lab tt day. So i already told my friend to sit with me so tt i wun be lonely. But it ended up such tt all the others could make it in the end. And i still just wanted to sit with my fren after such a long time so i just msged to come sit with me! When all was gd, problem started when we went home together. Some other friend misunderstood my stare and thought i was bringing some unfriendly vibes and all. I totally didnt have any such intentions of bringing unfriendly vibes. I have to agree tt initially, like months ago, i was angry with this person cos of a certain remark they made, or more like the way the remark was told to me. I wasnt happy that someone had said i am not a nice person without even knowing me at all. But guess things got interpreted wrongly cos the actual statement made was tt i was not a gd looking guy! So that person apparently jus said i wasnt gd looking. Sheesh, seriously, i think tts alrite! I didnt know tt this was the statement made. Cos i dun disagree of myself not being gd looking. I think i am really very average looking. So tt wouldnt have offended me, though it would have hurt me a bit if a pretty gal was to say it hahaha! But yea, i didnt know about this actual statement before, so i always thought tt it was said tt i was not a nice guy! However, i had moved on from tt incident like some time ago already! So, when this person msged my friend saying tt i am creating this unfriendly vibes with her, i just denied it. But my fren somewat accused me of judging a person without even knowing them! And tt remark was what tt angered me at tt pt of time. Really lost my temper and reacted angrily. I thought it was only fair for me to be angry with someone who thought i wasnt a nice guy without even knowing me. But tt too, i dun care anymore. So to have said tt i judge tt person badly just didnt seem like a correct thing to have said to me. So tt was a reason why i reacted in such a manner.

Later on i regretted for my actions. Surely there is a better way to have dealt with it but i am like so short tempered as of recent. I never expected myself to blow up in front of such a close friend suddenly! But yea guess all is well now. Hope i control my temper from now on, before i lose the valuable friends of mine. Sorted out the misunderstanding with the gal who mistook my stare too and guess now the air is cleared.

Haiz, such a small prob but yet so much of emotions involved in it. Dunno why like tt but guess i should stay away from such unnecessary problems in the future. Its not worth the time and all. Anyway, just felt like blogging the aftermath of the entire incident! I am totally fine right now. So to my close friends, dun have to worry hahaha! Adiyos!!!!!!!
Ganeshan | 7:49 AM