HeY! Well, i couldnt find anytime before the new yr to blog as i was too busy with outings. Guess today would be proper for me to reflect on how 2008 was for me. Ok, 2008 has been really a yr of very little ups and many downs! Haha. Most ppl whom i know re sayin tt 2008 was gd for them. But well, guess its not the same for me. I would consider 2008 as my worst yr so far!

The yr 2008 started off well for me. I had gotten the unit best commander award, my nsf life was coming to a close and I was more confident abt working towards a better understanding with someone!!! Was having a hell of a time going out with my parents and family members after a long time in life. I even mentioned in one of my entries earlier this yr tt the happiness was evident after we got rid of the financial issues. And since 2 yrs of national service was ending, i planned to spend quality time with my parents since i missed spending time with them for very long. Had so many plans before i was even gonna ord! Work, school, gyming and outings. I even tot of doing some courses like learning guitar and a foreign languauge. My ord date was on the 6th of February! A day tt i would never forget. Not tt it was a fantastic end to my army life, but it was the beginning of the end of my dearest and lovable Mum. That night, she was in pain and we rushed her to the hospital. The hospital itself didnt know if it was serious, tt they showed negligence in their work. The cost was my Mum's precious life. Never would i forget Feb 11th in my life, cos tts the day happiness left away from me! A day tt i realized there is only one love tt is inseperable in life, and tts the one between a Mother and her son. Losing someone who i loved the most in my entire 21 yrs of life, is something tt is painful than anything else in this world.

Anyways, life since tt day was abt how i had to overcome the sorrow and move on with my life thereafter. I made myself busy by finding a job as a relief teacher. Hit the gym whenever possible and didnt give myself any time to rest so tt i could forget abt whatever tt has happened. Found out who re the ppl true to me cos tt was the time i needed aid the most. Special thanks to frens like Rama, Sharadha and Sara! All my sji indian frens showed how much they cared for me during these tough period and i was so happy i made such gd frens. My army guys were truly amazing has almost everyone came down for the funeral and showed support. Really thank them from the bottom of my heart. Infact all the frens i have met for the past 21yrs had showed great support by jus showing up, so thanks to all of ya'll! There were some disappointments here and there during tt tough period but i understand why things were as such. But though i may forgive, i wun forget! Relatives are never helpful at all and it was evident during this important time.

Somehow, half the yr past with me tearing for almost everyday of it! May onwards i was really quite free! I started meeting a lot of my frens having splendid time with them. This is when i really thought of something more than ever in my life. I wanted to get closer somehow and tell what i felt. Took part in certain events and went for some shows tt i can never imagine myself to be in. Met lots of complications and problems soon after! Time arrived when i finally learnt tt i was purely wasting time for the past one yr plus! Decided i should give up and get prepared for uni life! Till this pt i never really had much laughter in my life.

Uni started. Met several new frens there. Very happy to have made such awesome friendships ard me. I loved the times in sch as it made me busy and it occupied most of my time. Its never nice when u have truely nothing to do! Uni's pace is very fast i have to admit. And every single second spent in sch actually counts and the hardest part is tt, u re all on ur own. I didnt realize it till recently. My results showed why others were better though in the final paper, we all were rooughly the same. The small tests had their part to play too. Very disappointed with my results as i really worked my ass off for it. But guess it should have been done from the start so tt my class tests would have helped me get the better grades tt i needed!
Nevermind, next semester is when i'll correct all those mistakes tt i did for sem 1.

I got my license in 2008 in my first attempt. Felt very happy abt it as i felt I accomplished one of the most important tasks i had! However, i didnt get the chance to drive tt much as the car is not with my father for sometime though he owns it. My dad disappointed me in a very huge way this yr. He made matters worse, took away the last bit of happiness within me and has caused me to reach to a state in life where i have never been to. I had to also deal with these problems all by myself without the aid of anyone. Showed me how much my mum shielded me away from such problems when she was ard. Now i know how tough her role was! And yea, though i didnt expect someone to know abt wat was goin on, they did infact knew abt it. And all confusions, thoughts and feelings were cleared. Dunno if its gd or bad, but yea it had a huge impact on me in a way tt i have to add it in here.

2008 was filled with many 21st parties tt i had to attend to. Finally its over and i feel happy abt it. I didnt get to celebrate mine the way i wanted to cos of a reason u'll should know by now. All the festive occasions i was really lonely at home. Be it deepavali, christmas or new yr! Felt like some prisoner during these times when ppl ard me were enjoying. But guess this is the kind of life tt i am fated to.

As u can see, there is hardly any gd memories tt 2008 left in me. I found it very hard to say anything good though i tried but seriously, i couldnt. U would probably agree tt 2008 was a bad yr for me. Never had i gone thru so much of problems and sorrows in my life. Hopefully 2009 turns out to be normal. I dun even wanna expect it to be gd cos of watever tt happened the yr before. Jus wish it would not be as bad as before! But well, u can see me smiling no matter wat despite a bad yr behind me cos somehow, i have come past it! If there is something always gd and making me smile in life, its definately my friends! Hope all my dear frens have a fanstic yr ahead and tt they would all see happiness filled thoughout the whole of this yr. A Happy New Year to all of ya!!!
Ganeshan | 5:31 AM